The "Bridge of Blood" ­ Mitrovica

"Ura e Gjakut" nv Mitrovicė
My name is Lulzim Hoti. I'm 24 years old. I have two brothers and a sister. I live with my parents in Mitrovica, a town in north Kosova. This year I hope to earn my bachelor's degree in Albanian Literature.

After the war we feel the freedom, but we are worried about our city, because it is divided: half-Albanian, half-Serb. I like taking pictures and, if I continue this work, I will prepare an exhibit for the troubled people of my half-city. When I was young I liked to look at pictures in different books and magazines. At age thirteen I made my first black and white photo. I was very happy, because it was mine. Living in occupation, however, it was difficult to realize my dream. I acquired my first camera when I was seventeen years old and spent all my money to develop the photos. The situation was getting harder and it was getting harder to realize my dreams, too. I will try to write about a part of my life, and I'm sure that I'll forget to write lots of things. It is hard to remember, but I feel a need to express myself.

Two years ago Serbian police beat me very badly because I was studying the Albanian language; they found a book hidden in my shirt. Shortly after that, the war began. The fighting came near my street, and we needed to escape. My grandparents stayed at home because they couldn't walk fast and they preferred to die in their home. We cared for them constantly, but unfortunately we had to leave them. A lot of people left their homes and walked like slaves, looking at the flames coming from their houses.

Everything was a mess. Along the street I saw an old man who was killed because he couldn't walk. I heard many children crying and I saw many out-of-control acts committed by all ages. People were confused; nobody knew where to go or what was going to happen. I had my camera and I decided to take documentary pictures. After three kilometers I saw that there were no Serbs around and I saw the perfect shot with refugees in the front and many houses in flame behind them. I took it. A woman accused me of being crazy to take the photo, in view of what was happening at that moment. This shocked me and after taking that photo I didn't have the nerve to take another picture.

After two more kilometers we found ourselves in a river-like column of people; it seemed as if everyone was leaving Mitrovica. The weather was bad. It rained a lot. We walked and walked between paramilitary forces and the Serbian army. I will never forget when a Serb policeman shot his gun near my foot and shouted at me to walk faster. But we were in luck; we met my uncle with his tractor and he helped us to travel together. Near Prizren Serbs stopped us for eight hours. We had no bread or water. Some children were crying and our hope for life was little.

After a short time I saw a man with his wife and dead baby in her arms. They buried the baby under a pear tree. They said that the baby died because they couldn't find milk. They had walked four days, trying to help that baby. For a moment I thought to get again the camera and photograph that horrible situation, but I wasn't sure. There were more than 300 cars and different vehicles with people, and behind us, thousands of people walking day and night. The Serbs used our column to camouflage their artillery, to prevent NATO from striking their position.

Some Serbian police waited for orders from their commanding officers. Someone said if we could find 5000 DM ($2,500) to give to the Serbs we could go on our way. And it happened; we found the money and we were able to continue. The journey lasted four days; I was unable to sleep. Near the Albanian border the Serbs were looking for gold, money and other valuables. Some of the people gave them those things in exchange for their lives; in some cases they paid with their lives. It was dark and they were checking all the boys. They were looking for identification and other documents and sometimes they divided men from women. I was lucky; a child started crying, distracting the policeman who missed me. He yelled, "Move!"

We crossed the border. It was raining hard, but finally we were able to breathe freely. That night I had to sleep on the cement floor of a demolished factory in Kukes, a poor Albanian town. After four hours I awoke, because my body was freezing. In the morning I found myself in front of many photographers; I had lost my role as a photographer and was a subject for the eyes of others.

The next day, after 10 hours in a truck, we found ourselves at the home of the Kaēa family in Shijak. We found great hospitality there. For two months we waited for the words, "You can return to your home." It finally happened. In a short time most of the refugees returned to Kosova, their homeland. We found our grandfather and grandmother safe at home; they told us of the different events that happened during the time that we were away. A lot of my neighbors were still looking for their arrested and missing people. Pain had just begun, but at the same time we were happy.

The old dream of freedom has come true. Thanks, USA! Thanks, NATO ! Thanks Europe. You protected our rights and we will protect the rights of others. Now I'm very happy, because we have freedom. I don't think it's too late to realize our dreams. I thank the American people for their help, and I especially want to thank my teacher, Martha Grenon, who worked hard with us and shared her experience and assistance to all people here. Thanks a lot, Martha.

Une quhem Lulzim Hoti, njėzet e katėr vjeēar.Kam dy vėllezėr dhe njė motėr.Tani jetoj me famijlen time nė Mitrovicė, qytet verior i Kosovės.Kėtė vit pres ta mbroj temėn e diplomės nė Fakultetin e Letėrsisė shqipe.

Ne ndjejmė lirinė, por ende jemi tė shqtėsuar me qytetin tonė, pasiqė ėshtė I ndarė nė gjysmė me shqiptar dhe gjysmė me serbė. Unė pėlqej tė fotografoj dhe nėse vazhdoj nė kėtė drejtim , do tė pėrgadis njė ekspozitė mbi kėta njerėz tė shqetėsuar tė qytetit tim tė ndarė. Kur isha I vogėl pėlqeja tė shikoja fotografitė nė librat dhe revistat e ndryshme. Nė moshėm trembėdhjeteė vjeēare unė bėra fotografinė e parė bardhė e zi. Isha I lumtur, pasiqė ishte imja. Ne jetuam nėn okupim dhe ishte e vėshtirė tė realizoja ėndrrat.Unė kisha kamerėn time tė parė kur isha 17 vjeēar dhe hargjoja gjithė paratė pėr tė zhvilluar fotot.Situata vėshtirėsohej e bashkė me tė edhe ėndrrat e mija. Do tė provojė tė shkruaj rreth njė pjese tė jetės sime, dhe jam I sigurtė se do tė harroj tė shkruaj mbi shumė gjėra.

Ėshtė e vėshtirė ta kujtoj, por e ndjejė si nevojė tė shprehem. Dy vite mė parė policėt serb mė rrahėm majftė keq, vetėm se studioja nė gjuhėn shqipe dhe si fakt qė mė gjetėn librin e fshehur nė gjoks.Pas njė kohe tė shkurtėr, lufta veē filloi. Luftimet u afruan praėn rrugės sonė dhe ne duhej tė largoheshin. Gjyshi dhe gjyshja qėndraun nė shtėpi pasiqė nuk ishin nė gjendje tė ecnin dhe preferonin tė vdisnin nė shtėpinė e tyre.Ne shqetėsoheshim pėr ta gjatė gjithė kohės, por mė nė fund duhej ti lenim. Plotė njerėz lanė shtėpitė e veta dhe ecnin dhe shikonin drejt shtėpive tė tyre qė digjeshin nga zjarri. Ēdo gjė ishte e tmerrshme. Pėrgjatė rrugės unė pash njė burr qė kishin vrar, pasiqė s'kishte arritur tė ecte. Dėgjoja tė qarat e fėmijėve dhe shihja veprime tė pakontrolluera nė tė gjitha moshat. Njerėzit ishin tė hutuar dhe askush nuk dinte se nga do shkonim dhe cfarė do tė ndodhte.Une kasha marr kamerėn me vete dhe vendosa tė bėja ndonjė fotografi dokumentare. Disa gra mė akuzuan si tė ēuditshėm dhe veprimin tim si tė pakuptimt pėr kohėn se ēfarė pėrjetohej nga ato.Unė u ndjeva keq dhe pas atij fotografimi tė vetėm nuk gjeja fuqi tė bėja foto tė tjera. Pas 2 km, ne gjetėm vetveten nė njė lum njerėzish qė ngjanin sikur tė gjithė lėshuan qytetin e Mitrovicės. Koha ishte keqėsuar dhe binte shi I madh. Ne vazhduam tė ecin ndėrmjet ushtrisė dhe forcava paramilitare serbe. Unė s'do e harroj kurr, kur njė policė serb qėlloi praėn kėmbėve tė mija, duke bėrtitur tė ecnim mė shpejt.Ne patėm fat, pėrgjatė rrugės takuam njė dajė me rimorkio dhe ai na ndihmoi tė udhėtonim sė bashku. Pranė Prizrenit, serbėt ndaluan kolonėn pėr tetė orė.Ne skishim mė ēfarė tė ham dhe pijmė. Disa fėmijė qanin dhe shpresat na ishin shuar. Pas pak kohėsh pashė njė burr dhe njė grua qė mbante fėmiun nė krahėt e saj. Ata hapėn njė grop varri pėr fėmijėn e tyre tė vdekur. Ata thanė se kishte vdekur nga mungesa e qumėshtit edhe pse kishin udhėtuar katėr ditė qė ta shpėtojnė atė foshnje.Ata gropuan njė varr nėn njė dardhė pėr foshnjen e tyre.Ata thanė se foshnja e tyre vdiē nė mungesė tė qumėshtit.Ata kishin ecur katėr ditė pėr ta shpėtuar atė fėmijė. Pėr njė moment mendova tė marr sėrish kamerėn pėr tė bėrė njė foto tė asaj pamje rrėnqethėse, por nuk isha i sigurt. Aty ishin mė shumė se 300 vetura dhe automjete tjera me njerėz, dhe pas tyre mijėra njerėz qė ditė e natė ecnin kėmbė.

Serbėt shfrytėzuan kolonėn tonė pėr tė bartur armatime tė rėnda pėrderisa NATO sulmonte pozicionet e tyre. Disa policė serb prisnin nga hierarkia tyre ndonjė urdhėr- vendim. Dikush morri informata se nėse ne i gjejmė 5000 DM ne nuk tė vazhdojmė. Ashtu ndodhi, ne i gjetėm aq para dhe vazhduam rrugėtimin tonė enigmatik. Kisha katėr ditė qė nuk kasha fjetur. Pranė kufirit tė Shqipėrisė serbėt filluan tė kėrkonin ari, para dhe gjėra tjera tė vlefshme. Disa prej prindėrve jepnin ato pėr t'i shkėmbyer me jetė, por nė disa raste I kushtonte edhe me vdekje. Ishte natė dhe ata kontrollonin tė gjithė meshkujtė. Kėrkonin letėrnjoftimet dhe nganjėhere ata ndanin meshkujt nga gratė. Unė pata fat; njė fėmijė filloi tė qante dhe polici serb qe i shpėrkujdesur sa qė nuk mė pa dhe bėrtiti ,,mbathjani"!

Ne kaluam kufirin. Binte njė shi i madh, por mė nė fund ne frymonim lirshėm.Atė natė duhej tė flinja nė cement tė njė fabrike tė shkatrruat nė Kukės, njė qytet i varfėr i Shqiperisė. Pas katėr orėsh unė u zgjova nga tė ngririėt e trupit tim. Nė mėngjes gjeta veten pėrball disa fotografėve. Tashmė kasha humbur rolin, isha bėrė subjekt i syve tė tjerė. Tė nesėrmen pas dhjetė orė udhėtimi me kamion, ne u vendosėm nė familjen Kaca, nė Shijak. Ne atje gjetėm njė mikėpritje tė jashtėzakonshme.

Pėrgjatė dy muajėve ne prisnim vetėm njė fjalė,,jeni tė lirė tė ktheheni nė shtėpitė tuaja" Ajo ndodhi. Pėr njė kohė tė shkurtėr shumica prej refugjatėve u kthyen nė Kosovė, nė atdheun e tyre.Ne gjetėm gjyshin dhe gjysheėn tonė nė shtėpi. Ata kishin pėr tė na treguar ngjarje tė ndryshme qė kishin ndoshur gjatė asaj kohe. Aty ishin plotė nga komshinjėt qė kėrkonin tė arrestuarit dhe tė zhdukurit e tyre. Dhimbja veq filloi. Nė tė njejtėn kohė ne ishim tė lumtur.

Ėndrra jonė e vjetėr u bė e vėrtetė. Falembderit SHBA, Falemenderit NATO ! Falemnderit EVROPE. Ju mbrojtėt tė drejtat tona, e ne do t'I mbrojmė tė tė tjerėve. Tani jam mė I kėnaqur, sepse kemi lirinė dhe mund tė punojmė pėr tė realizuar ėndrrat tona, mendoj qė nuk ėshtė vonė. E falemnderoj popullin amerikanė pėr ndihmėn e tyre, posaqėrisht dua ta falemnderoj instruktoren time Martha Grenon, e cila punoi shumė me ne dhe na dha pėrvojėn dhe mirėsinė tek tė gjithė njerėzitė kėtu. Falemdnerit shumė Martha.